The Many Reasons to Hate – Which One is Yours?


Have you ever hated someone, a particular view or value, or perhaps some clans or communities that even hearing their names make you feel uneasy? A hatred so strong that even an apology won’t make you forgive. And, what’s more unique, sometimes you don’t even know why you hate that person, or a certain view or tribe with so much intention.

What’s the reason behind all these? What are the motivations that can cause such hatred towards a certain someone, outlook or clan?

Cause #1: Fear

For many, they hate because the feeling of fear that emerge. As someone who’re born and raised in Indonesia, of course we know about the long-time hate between the Indonesian Chinese and what people regard as the natives.

Messages are passed on through generations, such as “Don’t be too closed to the locals, okay. They are vicious and they are not like us”, or “Be careful with those Chinese, they are foxy and greedy”. Sound familiar to you? But, let’s think about it again, are those situations we fear about will eventually come true?

Many horrible incidents have occurred between the natives and the Indonesian Chinese; from propaganda to series of riots in the past, all stem from the fear raised between these two tribes. For some people, this fear soon becomes intense hatred and consciously or unconsciously has led them towards many hateful situations even until today.

Strictly speaking, do you think it is wise to continue hating or passing on this hatred toward something because of our fears?

Cause #2: Dissatisfaction

Have you ever felt a sense of dissatisfaction so severe that it has led you to hate? It can be dissatisfaction towards a punishment sentenced to you though you are not guilty.  Or perhaps dissatisfaction towards some house rules imposed by your parents making you feel caged and confined? Have you ever felt this kind of dissatisfaction in your life?

Hatred which is rooted from a feeling of dissatisfaction emerges from a strong will to control something or  a strong desire to gain answer or response which is exactly like we want or we perceive as true.

So, it is not a surprise how this dissatisfaction can be a trigger to the intense hatred that we feel. Especially if this dissatisfaction has tremendous influence towards our lives or our survival. But, it is wise to preserve this hatred just because we’re feeling dissatisfied?

Cause #3: Helplessness

We can learn from the history how oppression and slavery towards the black skinned were done maliciously by the white skinned. The tyranny which took place for decades has caused a distinctive hatred felt by the black skinned. Although these days people from all around the world have stood up to confront dictatorship, it is undeniable how some people still have their hates towards the whites.

Many of them feel helpless because they’re born as blacks or the indigenous, and this can lead to the hatred felt towards the whites even though they’re not dealing with any kind of slavery anymore.

On the other way around, they are also some white skinned who unconsciously nurture their hatred towards the black skinned and feel that they are lower than them; regarded as those less moral or less educated. If this helplessness continues, then hatred can grow stronger and stronger. Will you just silent down this feeling of helplessness?

Cause #4: Lack of knowledge and understanding

Have you heard of the anarchic stories occurred due to the communist issues in Indonesia? Well, you know that this again has become a hot conversation topic in the country, and often, has caused hatred towards communism (or the communist) grows among those who actually know nothing about what communism really is.

In Indonesia, communism is regarded as a ruthless ideology and communists are called as atheists (people who do not acknowledge the existence of God). However, if you search the definition of communism on the internet, you would find all the explanations about communism as a political view which is way too far from the description spread out within the country. If you have this figured out, then you’ll know how out-of-the-way the difference between the views of communism in Indonesia compared to its real definition, and how people have such lack of knowledge towards issues they really hate.

On the other way around, I understand how there are some parties which encountered bad experience with certain people who called themselves as part of one of the communist parties in Indonesia and has done such vicious acts. But, is it wrong and is it too hard to find out a little bit more before you judge and hate something or some people?

Cause #5: Karmic bonds

In the olden days, the followers of Christianity and Islam had led a striking war due to the different beliefs they had. It was so remarkable that this war was written down in history books and bibles.

Though it had happened long ago and now there is no actual “war” happening between Moslems and Christians, but for some people, this seeds of hatred are still planted strong within them. What happened in the past has caused a collective karma received by both religions’ adherents; they dislike each other even without a real reason which happen personally to the. But, after knowing this, would you still continue to pass down this hatred?

It is easy for us to declare why we hate, but it can be difficult for us to point out why we love. We need to admit that it is not easy to not submit to the hatred already emerged, especially if this is rooted from the karmic bond.

One thing you can do every time hatred arises is to be aware of its appearing to you and then find out the root cause of this hatred. From the five reasons above, can you tell which one is the number one reason of your hatred? What situations or what issues can trigger you to this feeling of hate? Do share your stories in the comment column below.

Share the love...Share on Facebook
Share on Google+
Tweet about this on Twitter